Saturday, August 30, 2014

Our Jamaican Honeymoon Adventure - Day 1

Hello wonderful readers!

This is my first official blog post as a married woman, huzzah!  In the absence of my horror film blogging shenanigans, I wanted to take the time to document Andrew's and my wonderful experiences on our 10-day trip to Ocho Rios, Jamaica.  I will continue my horror blogging endeavors, now that pageant and wedding chaos is done, and definitely be sure to keep up with me in October for my first ever prize giveaway!

So back to the honeymoon.  I figured it would be more bearable for us, both mentally and visually, if I broke the trip down into different days and didn't write one enormously long post.  So, without further adieu, here is the exciting tale!

August 18th, Day 1
We thought we were pretty smart to come to Syracuse the night before to stay in the airport hotel to be on time.  Andrew knows me pretty well, eh?  So our first OFFICIAL stop on the way to Jamaica was…*drumroll*…Taco Bell?  Don't judge.  After we woke up the next morning, we were shuttled to the airport to embark on our, not one, but TWO layover journey to Montego Bay airport.  Our first stop?  Charlotte, NC.  We had a few hours until our next flight, so we ate delicious strombolis at Sbarro's and chilled until our flight to MIAMI FLORIDA.

Now, I have been to Florida many times, so believe me when I say that it's not the thrill of the Sunshine State that exclusively excites me, but I have been on a Will Smith Pandora kick ever since Jenna Marbles opened Pandora's box of juicy booty shaking jams to me in one of her weekly blog updates.  I just can't get enough of the station, and anytime one of his songs comes on I kind of fangirl freakout.  I don't know what it is, but his heavily sampled, bass dropping, clean-cut MCing speaks to my soul, and I want to be his BFF.  Okay, this is getting a little personal, so I'm going to shift gears back to the point…

I ONLY CAME FOR TWO DAYS OF PLAYIN'/BUT EVERY TIME I COME I ALWAYS WIND UP STAYIN'/THIS THE TYPE OF TOWN I COULD SPEND A FEW DAYS IN/ MIAMI THE CITY THAT KEEPS THE ROOF BLAZIN'

This is pretty much what Andrew had to endure the entire layover, God bless him, but luckily I had little to no voice after the wedding.  Mild sickness + drinking + heavy karaoke = hoarse whisper.  After the BIENVENIDO A MIAMI layover, we hopped on our last flight of the day to Montego Bay.  There was a very boisterous couple across from me on the plane, who were nice enough, but did not follow directions or any real form of social etiquette very well.  I resurrected my journal in order to document the trip, and the lovely man across the aisle asks me a question.  I was in la la land and didn't hear it, or didn't think I heard it, so I asked him to repeat it.

"Excuse me miss, are you an author?"

I guess this question isn't THAT obscure, as I was writing, but honestly?  Did he really think that?  It pains me to admit that the mere fact that I was actually physically writing probably made his head spin, and he must have thought that such an antiquated form of communication would be the work of fiction itself.  Not to mention that when he looked closely enough,  he could see that I was using cursive.  "What sorcery is this, woman?  This is madness!  You are writing in the Devil's tongue!"  Okay, I'm embellishing, but I was also writing in a purple magnetic 4x6 notebook with hummingbirds on it in size 42 font, so maybe if he'd thought about it for a second, he could have MacGyver-ed his way to a more logical conclusion.

We landed in Montego bay at 7:06 pm, and it was dark.  Huh?  As it turns out, Jamaica doesn't observe Daylight Savings, so they are an hour behind our time, despite being in the same time zone.  We walked down the not-so-glamorous stairs on our way to customs when, hold the phone, my NAME IS ON A PLACARD.  There is a woman legitimately waiting for both Andrew and I like we are VIP rock stars.  I was on cloud 9.  We met Chenice and she talked us through what we would need to get through customs, primarily our passports and customs forms.  Passport- check,  customs form- wait.  Uncheck that item.  My passport was not in my possession!  As soon as I realized it I knew exactly where it was…on the plane, in the seat back pocket.  NOW THIS IS A STORY ALL ABOUT HOW MY LIFE GOT FLIP-TURNED UPSIDE DOWN- NO!  Not today.  The plane is literally only feet away from us; I know it's on there and I refuse to let my negligence ruin our honeymoon!  Andrew, on the other hand, refuses to let me further botch things in a slow-paced fashion, so he runs back to get it for me.  I married a gentleman and a scholar.


Chenice's face returned to its normal color when he returned with said Passport, and because Andrew is extra awesome, he booked us Club Mobay VIP passes to secure us an escort that will let us cut everyone in the customs line and then take us to a fancy club afterward.  UN.BELIEVABLE.  We got to the club and they offered us drinks, sandwiches, and cold towels.  (Wait, those exist?)  We took a little bit of everything, and let me tell you how invigorating a citrus-scented cold towel feels on your flushed American face at 8:00 pm in a Jamaican airport: very.  From here on out, minus tipping and extras, it's all inclusive, folks.  We went across the way to the other club facility to wait for our driver and grab some Red Stripe tap beer.  It's a lot like a light lager, and I'm not much of a beer drinker, but it's Jamiaca, mon!  We had just started sipping when our driver arrived, so we said we'd chug them, to which he replied, "No, mon!  Take it with you!"  Coolness.

We had an hour and a half drive ahead of us, and we were only riding with one other couple, who had the same wedding date as we did!  I know this because it was elegantly bedazzled onto the back of her hoodie.  They were traveling to the Couples Tower resort, while we were headed to Couples Sans Souci resort, so we got off first since ours was closer.

Once we arrived at the resort, we were greeted and shown our room.  It was pretty amazing and so spacious!




Flower petals on our bed?  Tres romantique!

Jacuzzi spa bathtub, yeah mon!

After we settled in, we decided to go exploring, even though it was dark out.  I was a little apprehensive, as I was kind of scared that there would be large and exotic species of spider, snake, or scorpion wandering about in the eve time, but we went anyway, and I just ninja-stepped everywhere to ensure my safety.  We got a look at the main pool, but since it was dark the photo doesn't do it justice. 




We met one of the bartenders, Pete, who made us a special drink called a Stinger, which was quite yummy!  He offered to take us around to show us the real Jamaica if we wanted, which was a separate ordeal from the resort, but we kindly declined, in our wishy washy way of sounding like we're interested.  After perusing the resort, it was off to bed, and I could hardly wait to wake up to a sunlight scoured beachfront view in the morning! 

Day 1, over and out!