"Life is Hard": thoughts from my 8th graders and things I no longer have time for...

...like figuring out how to properly capitalize the rest of that title.  I must have tried it at least three different ways before I just gave up and succumbed to uncapitalized letters.  Whatev.

So yeah, it's been awhile.  Despite what my husband believes, I don't actually enjoy making excuses, although I tend to have more than my share of them.  Here are the excuses, er, reasons I've been absent these past few months:

• Full time job
• Beginning my school's musical
• Christmas concerts galore
• Buying a new house
• Moving into said house
• Taking a psychology class online
• Studying for said class' midterm and final
• Preparing and proposing my thesis for my graduate degree
• Being pregnant

One of my 8th graders said what we're all thinking the other day in class, and I have to echo her sentiments wholly, "Life is hard".  I can't remember exactly what we were discussing to make this realization hit her hard enough to vocalize it to the chorus, but it got a chuckle out of me, as I sarcastically responded with something akin to, "Yes, my little chickadee, life as an 8th grader is really difficult, but I assure you that your life gets no easier than it is right now."  She, and the rest of the class looked at me as though I had just replaced all of their Christmas gifts with coal, but despite our significant age gap, I do remember what 8th grade was like, and it did suck.  However, if I could take the bills, loans, paperwork, spam mail, and money problems in my adult life and swap them with my junior high cherubs' woes of gossip, friendship, missing the bus, forgetting homework, and relationship drama, I would do it in a heartbeat.

While I didn't have the time to go on a motivational speaker-like tangent at the time, there have been at least two different occasions where this story has come up these past few weeks, and I figured now was the best time to tackle the issue.

Newsflash: life IS hard.  It's probably the hardest thing you'll have to do, like, ever.  The other thing to be aware of, though, is that you are ultimately in charge of it.  I think too often we (and I am definitely included here, given the excuse-making scenario above) tend to place blame on so many external factors when things don't go the way we want them to.  While, yes, sometimes things get in the way and it is a perfectly justifiable reason for things not going to plan, when this happens again, and again, you need to ask yourself if you truly are the butt of some cosmological joke where legitimate issues ALWAYS prevent life from going your way, or maybe- just maybe- you are subconsciously making excuses for why things didn't go the way they were supposed to.  Perhaps, you are getting in your own way more than you'd care to admit.

Maybe this doesn't apply to you, but at times it certainly applies to me, so I have done a little soul searching and am attempting to make the most out of my time.  In preparation for a new year, I have compiled five pieces of advice for you to take into 2016.  Maybe you don't need all of them, but I'd encourage you to at least check them out.  While we always want things to go smoothly, it's often the more turbulent moments that we gain the most wisdom, so I'm hoping you can take some of my turbulence and learn from it, so that you can have a happy, healthy, and productive New Year!

STOP PROCRASTINATING.  As a high schooler and college student, this was an acceptable trait I possessed, and the excuse "Well, I work better under pressure!" was cute.  Now, in my late 20s, not completing things in a timely fashion or with my best effort is neither cute, nor acceptable, and I have had to face some consequences this year for my less-than-adult-like behaviors.  Nothing huge, but big enough for me to take a look at what I was doing from an objective perspective to see that I was ultimately the cause of my own turmoil.  I'll address this more specifically later, but proper time management is HUGE.  This is information that, as a mom-to-be, all of my mom-friends are sharing with me left and right, and while I'm sure I won't properly understand it until I have my child I'm doing what I can to be proactive about my time now.  And let me tell you, it makes a difference.

TAKE IT EASY WITH SOCIAL MEDIA.  The older I get, the less this social media experience makes sense to me.  "Mrs. Willis, are you on Tumblr?  Do you know what Tinder is?  What about YikYak?"  No, no, and no.  Seriously?  This is what you do when you get home from school?  See what others in the world are doing?  How is that even satisfying?  I am guilty of the occasional Facebook stalking as much as the next person, but at least these are people I know.  I felt the same blatant distaste when reality shows like The Real World, Survivor, and Big Brother started coming out.  While they are all entertaining I'm sure, let me break this down for you: You are literally watching other people live their life.  Sue me, but I find that incredibly boring, and please believe that I have enough amazing and interesting people in my ACTUAL social circles that I'd rather live my life with them, than watch and read about other people living theirs.  Give real life a chance, you guys.  Give it a chance.

LOOK AT THE BIG PICTURE.  It utterly confuses me when I see people so caught up with "living in the moment" that they make rash decisions that could impact the rest of their life without thinking.  Being a high school teacher I see a lot of drama, broken relationships, gossip, and changing of friend circles, and I think that is a part of growing up, finding yourself, and finding who you click with.  But what about adulthood?  I'm hoping that at this point, we know ourselves well enough to decide who we can or cannot "play nice with", which makes half of this equation easier, but I can't lie that my heart breaks a little when I hear about friends or family that have a "falling out."  

I can't be in everyone's shoes, and I don't know everyone's perspective, so I'm sure there are legitimate reasons for cutting people out of one's life.  If a relationship is no longer healthy, it serves you no purpose anymore, and I get that, but I suppose when it's family I just get sad about it.  Some things are out of your control: substance abuse, addiction, and innate stubbornness being a few.  Obviously you are only one side of the relationship, but take a look at your position: are you the one prohibiting the relationship from being mended?  If so, is it really worth it?  

I'm not casting judgment, and I know that every circumstance is different, but coming from a position where I seriously considered permanently shutting out my father, all I can say is now I am very glad I didn't.  Not having him around anymore, I now no longer have the choice, and I cherish every moment we got to spend together- some much happier memories than others.  Having him be ill for so long just got me thinking, "What if I told him I didn't want him in my life anymore, and he was gone the next day?  How would I feel knowing that was the last thing I said to my father?"  If you have a broken relationship, and it's important to you, fight for it.  Try to repair it.  No one is going to be around forever, and regret is a terrible thing to have to live with.

MAKE TIME FOR WHAT'S IMPORTANT.  2015 was a big year for my husband and I, for a lot of the reasons stated above.  One of the things that was good for me with all of the changes that were coming about, was whittling out what I did, and did not have time for.  This forced me to take a look at my schedule, and basically clear it out of everything that was going to interfere with my immediate goals: stay employed, be a good wife, be a good mom.  Pretty small list, but one would be naive to think that any one of these three goals is easy, and doesn't come at the cost of a lot of time, effort, and planning.  I made the decision to drop just about everything I was doing that was not family or work related, and while I am bummed at the fact that some of my most beloved activities and singing groups are now on the back burner or are dissipated, I am happy with the choices I've made.  17-27 year-old Corri was unmarried, baby-less, and had the world at her fingertips.  I knew that at some point I wouldn't have all of that free time, so I did a lot of things, like...

• Traveling to Jamaica, Scotland, Wales, Great Britain, and Italy
• Playing ultimate frisbee
• Competing in pageants
• Baton twirling
• Working with one of my best friends to create a 501c3 not for profit pageant organization
• Playing poker
• Joining barbershop choruses, quartets, and a cappella groups
• Blogging
• Competing in Cornhole tournaments
• Visiting the two most magical places on earth with my fiancé (the Jurassic Park World and the Harry Potter World at Universal Studios)

...among many other things.  Despite the fact that my bucket list has more unscratched items than scratched items I'm not giving up on it yet, but I do need to take a break and focus on my family. The last 10 years have been awesome, and I've grown a lot.  While the things I've been a part of, done and seen are very important to me, I have new goals that require my time and dedication.  Making time for what's important is not about eliminating the past, so much as it is balancing it with the present, and planning for the future.

DON'T SACRIFICE PRECIOUS TIME FOR WHAT ISN'T IMPORTANT.  This sort of continues my rant with social media, but I suppose that's mostly because I don't find it as important as I used to.  While blogging is a hobby of mine, I do it for me, because I enjoy it.  Facebook, on the other hand, is a connective tool for me to stay in touch with friends and family that I don't often get to see.  Because I have been watching a lot of Star Wars recently, I'm going to compare Facebook to the force: it's just there.  Whether or not you choose to use it for good or evil is your choice.  Now, evil may be a strong word, so let's replace that with negativity for the purposes of this discussion.  Keep in mind that YOU are in control of your Facebook.  Are you still with me?  Good.

Two of the number one things that I hear people complain about on Facebook are babies and weddings.  "Ugh, someone else is getting married!  Another baby picture?  Gosh, don't these people have lives?"  I'm biting my tongue really hard here, as this inner monologue plays out in my mind of people complaining about what other people do with their time on Facebook (I think this whole topic makes me a pseudo-hypocrite, but look at how much I care.  This much ----->        ).  I feel strongly about two things regarding this conundrum that, honestly, people put themselves into:

• I would much rather look at babies, weddings, and engagement announcements than political garbage, people's meals, and I'm-begging-you-to-comment-on-my-appearance-selfies any day of the week.  This is just my opinion though, and since not everyone agrees, it brings me to my second set of feelings...
• Do you know why I don't watch Duck Dynasty?  It's because I don't like it.  Do you know what I would do if I turned on the TV and it came on?  I would change the channel.  Let that sink in for a moment.  Yeah.  You, YES YOU, have the power to see, and ultimately unsee anything you like, or dislike on Facebook.  Powerful stuff, eh?

If you don't like pictures of babies, engagements, weddings, or generally happy wonderful moments on Facebook, you have an option people.  You don't have to passively aggressively shun people.  You don't have to rant about it.  In fact, you don't have to deal with it in any way.  Block, unfollow, or unfriend the culprits of the joy you wish to unsee, and just be done with it.  You know what annoys my husband about Facebook?  Everything.  So guess what?  He's not on it.  He's also an adult and makes adult decisions, instead of wallowing in self-pity on the internet, so I kind of love him.

The number one thing that I don't have time for that people love to do/be/harbor in life (and mostly on Facebook)?...NEGATIVITY.  Ain't nobody got time for that!  Guess how long it took you to write that status that complained about what someone else was doing?  One to four minutes (after you carefully worded it so that you can be snarky/vague enough to get your point across without overtly offending anyone...sneaky sneaky, you are).  Guess what you could have done with that time instead?

• Made a Hot Pocket
• Done 44 jumping jacks
• Pet a baby pig approximately 127 times
• Told at least 6 people you loved them

See what I mean?  Negativity takes time.  Precious time.  Use it for good, Luke, not for evil.

Sorry if you got nothing out of this, but I hope you did!  Here's hoping that- with or without my advice- your 2016 brings you and your family good health and many blessings.

Much love,

Corri

Font Nazi

My husband and I tend to be Font Nazis, or Font-zis- if you will.  I tend to utilize a variety of fonts for certain occasions, while he is more the tried-and-true-stick-to-the-seven-original-fonts kind of guy.  He often chastises me when I use a font that looks lovely, but is less than easy to read, while I openly criticize his lack of creativity regarding font selection.  Can you tell which is the computer engineer and which is the music teacher?  Anyway, regardless of our aesthetic word art preferences, it is plain to see that we are both hypersensitive to the font choices- for better or for worse- of businesses, restaurants, web pages, and the like.  Some venues, like the blogging world for example, give you a limited selection of fonts with which to type, leaving the user with a much smaller arsenal of resources.  The average person using any given word processing program, or photographic manipulation program, however, has the sky as the limit regarding font use.

The following fonts seen below are much like the force; some may be used for good, while others for evil.  Take a look at them and see where you fall on the list of 16 Font Nazi Offenders.

I didn't care enough/have the time to change from the default font.  I'm probably rushing to get something done to meet a deadline.

hi!!!  i don't like to b taken srsly w/ professional work!!!

Too seriously, I take my work.  Implied infringements on copyrights, I also don't mind.





This one time, I thought about being a horror novelist.  Then I realized I couldn't write worth a damn, and was just ultra inspired by the Goosebumps-like nature of this font.

I don't have time to sign this document, so I will select the swirliest font imaginable to trick people into thinking I did.

I wish it was still 1930.

When you read this document, I want you to have the sinking feeling that a velociraptor is lurking in your office fern...

The hipster cousin of Times New Roman, it's the slightly cooler font to use for typing formal documents.

I still write like a fourteen year old girl.  Oh, and you're reading this on My Little Pony stationary.

I am struggling to get my final paper in on time, and I am completely desperate to meet the page length requirement.

I, too, am struggling to get my final paper in on time, and I am subtly desperate to meet the page length requirement.

Nothing I type is important enough for you to be able to read it.

I was one of only eleven people that actually liked the old school Macintosh font.

I want this letter to appear hand written, but don't really feel like hand writing it.

I want this poster heading to appear much more profound than it actually is.




Man, my customers will probably actually believe that this menu is made out of papyrus with this super believable font!

I love me some fonts, and I have probably used all of these "offenders" at one point or another.  All fonts, much like alcohol and Butterfinger candies, can be used well if done in moderation.  So font, wisely, fellow Font-zis.  Font wisely, indeed.

Song Lyrics that Make No Sense

Hey y'all.  I always have Blogger's Guilt when I take a long break, so I feel it necessary to update you on things that have kept me away.  Necessary?  Is it Necessary for me to drink my own urine?  No, but it's sterile and I like the taste.  (Bonus points if you can name that movie)  Anyway, so I can sleep at night, here are the top three things that have kept me away these past few weeks:

1) Grad classes
2) Assessment Building Workshops
3) Writing my thesis paper

Now that my confession is out of the way, we can move on sans guilt to the actual meat of my post: Song Lyrics that Make No Sense.  If you have ever listened to contemporary music, the notion of this idea is not foreign to you.  TONS of songs have lyrics that, when viewed under a slightly more analytical scope, don't really make sense.  While some lyrics are more overt with their inability to communicate to intellectuals, others are sneakily hiding their ridiculousness under pseudo-proper grammar and may make sense on a surface level, but not when applied to the societal rules of how we as human beings are asked to live.  Here is a small list of some of the most well-known offenders of this crime, complete with video entertainment.

Turn Down for What - DJ Snake and 'Lil Jon
Despite the fact that this song is fairly infectious when it comes on in clubs or parties, the question on everyone's minds seems to be "What does that even mean?"  Its super ambiguous title, which- might I add- are the only words to the song, (minus 'fire up that loud, another round of shots', an eleven syllable phrase that 'Lil Jon successfully mutates to nine) paired with its strong beat and predictable (yet minimal) orchestration makes people initially interpret this song as a powerful party anthem a la LMFAO's "Shots" or Usher's "Yeah".  Eventually, though, the brain cells kick in and one realizes that, unlike the aforementioned songs, this one has no story, climax, or real point whatsoever.

Despite the aforementioned qualms with this song, here is the bone-shuddering reality I am really exposing here.  Below you will find an audio video of the song.  Click ahead to 2:25 and tell me what you hear.  Go ahead, I'll wait...

Yeah, you heard right.  Flipping' jingle bells.  As if this song wasn't bad enough as is, someone felt the need to add sleigh bells to this unequivocal masterpiece of loud noises and screeching synthesizers that merely repeat the previous theme up an octave.  What genius, what avant garde musicianship!  (P.S.- you're welcome I didn't post the actual video.  While its ridiculous characters and crude dancing, which have no common theme or relevance to anything, actually sort of fit the off-base and pointless lyrics, it will give you nightmares)

Time of Our Lives - Pit Bull and Ne-yo

The introduction to this video highlights some people that have fallen on financially hard times, leading you to believe that the song might have some level of poignancy to its lyrics.  On the contrary, the song goes in a much different direction, stating: "I knew my rent was gon' be late about a week ago.  I work my ass off, but still can't pay it though.  But I've got just enough to get up in this club, and have a good time until my time is up." 

What is the inner monologue, here?

  

Friend 1: "Damn, man, our rent's gonna be late AGAIN.  We'll probably get evicted soon."

Friend 2: "Yeah that sucks, bro"

Friend 1: "Hey, how much you got?  Instead of paying our landlord what little money we have, to show good faith that we will pay them when we get the rest, let's spend it on an overpriced cover charge, buy expensive drinks, and throw money at some scantily clad women!"

Friend 2: "Hell yes."

Before you ask, yes I've been broke, and yes it sucks.  The one thing that being broke kind of taught me, strangely enough, was an element of money management.  I'm not great at it, but the general rule of thumb I try to abide by is the golden rule of money management: Don't spend what you don't have.  If you owe someone rent, the money you earn from whatever you do is owed to them, and therefore not yours to spend on liquor and strippers.  Sorry, Pitbull, that's just the way the world works.

Somebody - Natalie La Rose and Jeremih
I have to say that after watching this video, I have a minor girl-crush on Natalie.  She is an incredible dancer, and is stunning to boot.  She reminds be a lot of Aaliyah, too (whom I always loved) so my apologies, Natalie, for the less than stellar review of your lyrics.

First, let's just get it all out right now: this is a terrible cover of what was an iconic Whitney song, R.I.P.  I'm just not a fan, despite the song being catchy as hell, but that's not really what I'm getting into today.  There are a lot of weird things going on here with lyrics, the first being her name right out the gate at :03 in.  Can she not flip her "r"s or something?  I literally had no idea what she was saying for about seven straight months until I watched the video and figured out it was her name.  Coming from someone who struggled to just pronounce an "r", let alone flip or roll one, I feel your pain, but the simple solution is to just NOT ANNOUNCE YOUR NAME AT THE BEGINNING OF YOUR OWN DAMN SONG.  Yes, Jason DeRulo, this is geared toward you as well.

The second issue I have is her breakdown in the bridge at 2:14.  Here's a taste of the depth of her lyricism: "In the club like what, we be in the party in the club like what...We be in the city going dumb like what, in the club like what."

Wow.  Just, wow.  How those lyrics speak to me.

Third problem.  At 1:48 (and other places) she sings "And when they try to make us leave we turn and say we're never going home".  Natalie, this is bad for at least two glaring reasons:

1)  We're never going home?  So, you're going to live there, in the club huh?  What are you going to eat, pretzels and bar chex mix?  Just drinking alcohol and soda non stop?  Sleeping on the disease ridden floor or in the vermin-infested basement.  Make better life choices, friend.

2)  Pretty sure you can get arrested for refusing to leave a bar.  Just ask this guy.

I Love It - Icona Pop and Charlie XCX
Similar to "Turn Down for What" this song has minimal, well, everything.  It does have semblance of a verse, a chorus, and a bridge, but its musical diversity stops there.  Lots of distorted bass and predictable orchestration...GAH!  Sorry.  This is not why I'm here...

Lyrics, people.  They just don't make sense.  Let's first analyze the insanity of the verse, around :34 in, shall we?  "I crashed my car into a bridge, I don't care.  I love it."  What are you, a Hilton or a Kardashian?  How can you crash your car and not care about it?  The average person does not have enough money to just wreck a car in hopes to pay for a new one that they like better.  Oh, except for this idiot.  These ladies are either sociopaths, or just insane, neither of which is preferable.  Let's just all agree to not run our cars into bridges, and that if we do, we will actually care about it, deal?  Deal.

Here's problem number two at 1:19-"You're from the 70s, but I'm a 90s bitch."  Let's just be kind of conservative and say he was born in 1977 and she was born in 1993.  That is still a sixteen year difference in age.  All her problems likely began with her hastiness in choosing to date someone much older than she without realizing they had very little in common.  I don't know about you, but if I had a 22 year-old, I wouldn't be thrilled if she was dating a 38 year-old.  (As a side note, I would be less thrilled if she crashed her car into a bridge...and didn't care)

Love in this Club - Usher and Young Jeezy

Ok, so these lyrics do make sense, Usher, I'll give you that.  But can we talk about the issues involving some of the lyrics you provide, particularly at 4:02?  "On the couch, on the table, on the bar or on the floor"  I'm going to assume with your celebrity status, Usher, that you've been in many more clubs than I, but have you thought to investigate these surface areas thoroughly?  All of them are usually sticky from drinks, and full of germs.  Sounds like a great place to roll around naked, right?  Ew.  Can we also discuss how unsafe it is to do the deed on the floor of a club just for fear of not getting trampled by a Jumanji-like stampede?

Lastly, the most obvious reason why the whole premise of this song is just a really freaking bad idea, is that it is illegal to do in public.  Don't believe me?  Ask these people.

I know there are many more lyrics that are mucho bizarre in many other songs.  Send your suggestions my way and maybe I'll make a second installment.

Peace!

P.S. - The movie was Dodgeball...I just saved you an IMDB trip.

The Slow Decline of my Most Recent Accomplishment

So recently, I accomplished a long-time personal goal of mine, and made it to the payout structure of an online poker tournament.  Now, this may seem insignificant to you for a few reasons:

1. Poker tournaments are stupid.  Why do you care, and most importantly, why waste your time?
2. Pfft.  I've done that lots of times.  Are you a newb?
3. Ummm, I'm pretty sure that's illegal.

All valid points, so I'll address them each individually.

1. This is just one of those things that we'll have to disagree on, and I don't play poker, let alone tourneys, very often.
2. Good for you!  We should chat and you can give me pointers.  See my response to number one for my recently limited exposure to the game.
3. There are no federal regulations for online poker.  The problem arises with specific states, and oftentimes banks that do not allow deposits.  There are several legal poker sites available for US players, with more anticipated arrivals within the next four years.  For more information check out http://www.legaluspokersites.com, or http://uspokersites.us/laws/

So what did I even do?  It's really not that significant, so don't get too excited.  Basically, I registered for a freeroll tournament (i.e. playing against TONS of people for free...therefore no banks or deposits required.  See the loophole?) and had to make it to the top 100 out of 1200+ players to get...drumroll...

NINETY CENTS!

That's for 100th place, going up to a max of $100 for first place, but luckily I surpassed the $.90 death sentence of mediocrity.

Happy Hamburger Day

It's taken me awhile to gather up my thoughts and emotions to be able to post again, plus life and weekends have been crazy busy.  Here is my attempt to rectify my absence, for the seven people that read what I have to say on a regular basis.  Thank you, seven people.  I appreciate your business.

"What is Hamburger Day?  Did she just make that up?"  Well, yes I did...sort of.  It should come as no surprise to you that today is Memorial Day, and I guess my made up holiday name is a cathartic and snarky way of calling out people who don't respect, appreciate, or understand what today is actually about.  (If you are between the ages of 1-13 you get a pass, otherwise, shame on you)

I can understand the bastardization of holidays like Easter and Christmas, and while I don't condone it, I get it.  Not everyone is a Christian, and not everyone celebrates these holidays with the solemnity and purpose they were designed to possess.  That's ok, because we're all unique snowflakes and not all built to believe, say, think, or celebrate things the same way, so despite my personal feelings on the sanctity of spiritual holidays, I certainly don't judge.

But if you are a U.S. citizen, which I'm going to wager that the majority of people living in our country are, Memorial Day applies to you, and you should recognize that.  We are all afforded opportunities and benefits that other places in the world don't even get to dream of having, and I feel like most of the time it is not only forgotten, but taken for granted.

Break

The last time I shared my thoughts and feelings to the world via my blog seems so long ago, and I promise that it was not an intentional hiatus.  The title of this post seems very apropos, since in addition to my school and blogging break, many things have broken these past two weeks, and my heart was one of them.

Easter vacation for me is pretty normal, minus the triathlon that is Easter week madness.  Between Palm Sunday, Holy Thursday, Good Friday, Easter Vigil, and Easter Sunday, the Roman Catholic celebration of Easter definitely can be exhausting, and this year was no different.

I don't really want to get into details, for the mere reason that that's not what this post is intended to be about.  That being said, my father started feeling much worse than normal right around Wednesday, April 1st, and his spirit left us around 3:55 am on Saturday, April 4th.  Obviously, that changed a lot about my break, and I guess this post is mostly to share with you all- or at least attempt to- what is going on inside my head.

For those of you that don't know me very well, I tend to be a pretty spiritual person.  I try to make it to church on a regular basis and be an active part of the services.  I'm not going to engage in a philosophical debate at this time regarding my religious beliefs, but I'll summarize it similarly to how I silenced one of my interrogative boyfriends: I worship because, at the end of the service, I feel like a better, more complete person.  Agree.  Disagree.  That's cool, I'm not going to judge because we all have our beliefs, but this post will make more sense if you just know that about me.  Cool?  Ok.

For those of you biblically minded, you can appreciate my connection that the most painful day of my father's life, and the last full one at that, was on Good Friday, and also that just prior to Easter Triduum, my father was in the hospital for three days.  I couldn't seem to shake the fact that this was not a coincidence, and if you know me at all, you know I don't believe in coincidences.  Despite that 24-hour period being, to date, the most emotionally draining day of my life, I would like to believe that the fact that it happened to be Good Friday was for me to be able to find some comfort in my father's suffering.  He was not alone.

But it goes deeper than that.  Because my father had no salivary glands from the radiation and chemotherapy from his first cancer 10 years ago, he often took a tiny sponge swab and rinsed his mouth out with water when it got unusually dry.

For those not understanding the relation: prior to Christ's crucifixion, the soldiers soaked a hyssop branch in wine and offered it to Jesus because he thirsted.  It's not exactly the same thing, but as my dad was being hydrated with these little pink sponges merely hours before he passed, I shuddered at the eeriness of the connection.

Vegas Vacation Day 6 - All you need is love…and a good p-p-p-poker face

Day 6- 2/19/15
Today we woke up a bit earlier than normal so that we would have time to hit the Hoover Dam, part of the Grand Canyon, and head back to our resort in enough time to get ready for the Beatles Cirque du Soleil show.  Busy day!

We started by heading to Dunkin' Donuts (duh) and got our caffeine and pseudo nourishment for the day before we headed out to the Hoover Dam, which was only about 40 minutes away.

Once we arrived, we knew we were going to be doing a lot of walking based on the location we parked, but at this point we were used to it.  The first thing we got an up close view of was a bottomless hole, that I had a really hard time understanding at first.  We pretty much all agreed it was definitely the tunnel the Orcs used in Lord of the Rings.

We elected to not take the Hoover Dam tour, and I'm not much of a tour person so I was happy.  It turned out that Darrell was pretty much a wealth of knowledge on the subject, and most of the really cool views were from the top anyway.

Vegas Vacation Day 5 – Batman needs a better dental plan

Happy Birthday, Mom!  Her birthday is not today, but it was on the fifth day of our trip, so I figured I’d throw a shout out to her regardless.

Day 5- 2/18/15

Because of the flexibility of the time share where we were staying, we were able to move to another Vegas resort for a couple of days, which was kind of nice because we could change it up a bit.  The Grand Desert resort was much closer, had more shuttles, and was a lot larger, although the rooms were about the same.  This one may have been a bit bigger, but they both had the same amount of space and amenities.

For lunch, we headed to Naked City Pizza, which apparently was featured on the show Diners Drive-Ins and Dives.  It was really good, despite the waitress needing a little bit of help taking our order.  From my own experience, it’s tricky to take a party of six’s order from memory without errors, which is why I don’t attempt it.  I’m assuming that it’s usually easier with pizzerias, as even larger parties likely end up sharing a pizza, two at the most, but I guess we are not most larger parties.  She got the order right eventually, I think.

After that, we were able to drive back to the resort, since we had rented a vehicle for some ease in traveling.  We wanted to head to the Hoover Dam, and possibly the Grand Canyon at some point, and we were told by many a person that renting a vehicle would be easiest.  Since a trip like that would wipe out a lot of the day, we opted to do that tomorrow, and today’s trip would be to Old Vegas on Fremont Street, which was also highly recommended to us.

Luckily for us, I thought, I was super observant after the show last night, and when we went to Harrah’s to transfer to the Rio (where the World Carnival Buffet was located) I noticed a shuttle that advertised Fremont Street, so we were going to opt for that instead of trying to drive there in hectic traffic.

I worded this whole travel scheme so poorly that everyone assumed that the shuttle was AT the Rio, which we were able to rectify before we got on the Rio shuttle, thank goodness.  This is why I’m not a travel planner.  Well, that and a lot of the SNAFUs found in Day one’s post, but that is neither here nor there.  After discovering that the shuttle was actually at Harrah’s, we investigated further and found that this was a veeeerrrrryyy roundabout way of getting to Fremont Street, and were gauging the delicate ratio of time traveling to time actually spent at the location before having to leave.  It was at this time that a lovely man calling the cabs suggested we take a limo, since it would cost more to take two cabs.  We agreed, since we were running short on time, and while most of me was super embarrassed that I was a terrible travel planner, a small portion of me was psyched to be in a limo, since I’ve never done that before.

I LOVED everything about Fremont Street.  It felt fun, cozy, and a little bit more real than the “new” Vegas where we had been occupying most of our time. 

We even got to meet some Super Heroes who I could only describe in the following way:

Vegas Vacation Day 4 - Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough

I usually like to post my blogs over the weekend, but since it's already Monday it appears I am a day late and a dollar short.  By the end of this post you will soon realize that day four left me a bit more than a dollar short.  Karma, I guess…

Day 4- 2/17/15
Dyllon and Lisa arrived a little later than they had expected to, but it was still fairly early in the morning.  We got them situated in the condo, and then headed down to the Silver Sevens Casino and buffet.   The breakfast buffet was highly recommended to us, and if we registered for the Player's Club card, we could get it for $6.99, can't beat that!

Due to our cab debacle the night prior, we decided we would walk today, since the casino was not that far from the place we were staying.  It was also sunny out, and we figured a little walking would do us some good, since we were planning on gorging at the buffet.

Sooo…it maybe was a bit further of a walk than it appeared in a taxi cab.  It was definitely at least a mile, which wasn't awful by any means, but it took us about a half hour to walk there, considering traffic and crossing the streets.  Despite the fact that it indeed was sunny, it was not particularly warm in the shade, which was primarily where we were walking.  I'm absolutely not complaining, since at this time it was about 95 degrees warmer in Vegas than it was back home, but whether you're in 68 degree weather or -30 degree weather, dressing inappropriately for the temperature at hand is still not the most pleasant experience.  I tend to (wrongfully, for sure) plan my outfit based on the amount of sunlight outside.  It could be 80 and dark, or 20 and sunny, and I would without fail dress stupidly for both days.  It's a psychological thing, I guess.

We may have been in Nevada, but it's just about the same effect

Vegas Vacation Day 3 - Dance Walking

Day 3 - 2/16/15
Happy six-month wedding anniversary!  The only reason this even dawned on me was because my mother had mentioned a few days prior that we would be vacationing over that half-year milestone, thus proving her selflessness in not even mentioning her birthday was just two days after.  Love that woman.

Anyway, Monday was kind of a dull start, as we were wrapped up in a presentation for a majority of the afternoon, but it resulted in free golf vouchers and meal vouchers, so we were not about to complain.

Once we got back to the resort, we immediately booked tickets to a show called "Raiding the Rock Vault" that had been highly recommended to us, and we were pretty excited to go see it.  Despite the fact that we had already occupied most of the day, it was nice that most Vegas shows started at 9:30, so we had a little bit of time to explore before hand.

We hadn't really had lunch, and figured we would grab a bite to eat after the show, since we were cutting it close.  So close, in fact, that we didn't think we could necessarily rely on the hourly shuttle, so we decided to call a cab to expedite the process.

The following things happened between when the cab was called, and when the cab arrived:

• The resort shuttle arrived
• The resort shuttle left
• I called my mother, and spoke to her on the phone for 20 minutes
• The resort shuttle came back again

FORTY MINUTES AFTER WE CALLED, the cab driver finally decided to show up, and boy was that ride pleasant and cheerful.  Not awkward in the slightest.  Luckily, we were able to pick up the tickets later than we'd thought, so we were still able to grab them once we got to the Tropicana.

Vegas Vacation Days 1 & 2 - People Don't Run in the Airport

As I begin to dive into the seventh circle of hell AKA production week of my musical, I am finding myself ill, exhausted, stressed, and going in eight different directions at once.  Blogging, for me, is therapeutic, and nothing would make me happier than teleporting back to Las Vegas with the amazing people I was lucky enough to travel with, so without further adieu, I invite you to come with me on my Vegas chronicles.

Day 1- 2/14/15
Happy Valentine's Day!  After having an 8:00 am salon appointment, I headed to Dunkin' to grab Andrew and I some breakfast as we finished our last minute packing.  Deltra Lynne and Darrell had planned on us leaving at 11:30, but they arrived a little after 11, and we were ready, so on our way we went!

The drive to Syracuse was short and sweet, and we arrived super early, which was nice because it allowed us time to grab some lunch at the Saranac Pub.  When we got to the gate, the prior flight hadn't even boarded yet, so we had a bit of down time until our plane boarded.  While we checked our e-mail and listened to music, Deltra Lynne and I mused about cinematic depictions of airports, and how absolutely unlikely and unrealistic it is when they show people running to catch a flight, and they make it within minutes.  Umm, airport security anyone?  No one can just waltz into an airport and run to catch their flight, so we laughed about how sensationalized they made the process look in movies.

We noticed that on our tickets, we all had asterisks by our seat numbers, unbeknownst to us as to why.  It all started to make sense after about an hour, when we realized the plane was overbooked because of all the cancellations, as there was a winter storm coming in all over the East coast.  Great.  They asked for four volunteers to not board the plane, and receive a $300 reimbursement for inconvenience and new travel arrangements.  Darrell and Andrew proceeded to get the 411 on our options, and they said if we volunteered, they could reimburse us for taxi fare to Buffalo or Rochester, but because of the storm there was no guarantee they would fly us that night.  They also suggested Philadelphia International Airport, who was guaranteed to send us out the next morning at 7:50 am.  Because of the hassle and drive, they would reimburse us $850.  Apiece.  We readily agreed, and were very glad that we had the wherewithal to not check our bags, and pack light so that all we had were our carry ons.  To Philly we ventured!

This drive was not short, nor sweet.  We were starting to see the beginnings of the storm that was screwing over all of the Northeast flights, and couldn't have been any happier that in less than 24 hours we would be in warmer conditions.  The drive was about four hours, and started really poorly.  We even saw a car ahead of us fishtailing, and they ended up driving off the road and flipping over into the left hand ditch.  Luckily, we were able to avoid collisions on the highway, and luckily for the car the snow was high and powdery, and they were going pretty slowly.  We were all a little shaken up, and called 911 to get the police to come.  We definitely all said a quick prayer for the passengers, too.

28 things I learned after 28 years

So yesterday, was my birthday…

…and I officially turned 28 years old, huzzah!  With age comes a lot of things: wrinkles, well-wishes, and wisdom, being the three most obvious, but it's often too easy to not put things into perspective and be thinking solely about the future.  Not that that's a bad thing, per se, but a lot of the time I love looking back at what a pessimistic, argumentative idiot I used to be, and rationalize how I got where I am currently, and what I learned to get here.  It's sort of like looking back at old diaries and realizing how naive you used to be…actually, it's exactly like that.  Through heartaches, strained friendships, painful loss, joyful gain, and lots of laughing, I'm proud to say I made it to 28.  Here are 28 things I've learned on the road of life that I'd like to share with you:

1)  If at first you don't succeed, try try again.  My brother used to pull my feet out from underneath me when I was learning to walk, but despite the fact that he made the process more challenging, I ended up figuring it out eventually.  Perseverance is key, which is the only reason why I now know how to ride a bike, thanks to Mary.  It may have been when I was the ripe old age of 14, but who's counting?

2) You lose 100% of the hands you fold.  Poker analogy for saying you can't win anything if you don't risk anything.

3) Everything happens for a reason.  Don't fight it, and don't ask questions.  It will be revealed in due course, I am certain of it.

4) Everything is a game of balance.  You have one life, and one body, and you have to make the most of it.  Balancing everything from activities, to meals, to workouts, to work schedules is a key to remaining sane.

5) Make the effort to have a relationship with your parents.  Not everyone is blessed enough to know their mother or father, and only one other person is lucky enough to be able to claim my mother as theirs too, but I can't stress the importance of our relationship enough.  Mother knows best, unless it's in Rapunzel's case...

6) Stand up for yourself…because it's likely that no one else will do it for you.

How to not suck at Valentine's Day

For some reason I seem to have this fascination with researching holidays as they rapidly approach on the calendar.  Even Trivia Crack ascertains that History is one of my strongest subjects, so perhaps it knows me better than I know myself.  Maybe it's my attempt to not seem ignorant as I choose to rant about said holiday, or maybe it's just my sheer intrigue at how we celebrate things in the 21st century, as opposed to how the holiday itself was intended to be celebrated.

As I dug up the dirt on Valentine's day, I found some interesting tidbits on the History channel.  Memorable items include a rebel priest Valentine (who was later to be canonized as a saint) marrying young couples despite the emperor's ban on marriage, and the pagan ritual of slapping women with bloodied animal hide to promote fertility.  Perhaps the 50 Shades of Grey story isn't as far off the beaten path of romance as we think…I kid!  I haven't even read the books, nor do I have any desire to.  I digress…

The video above has some more detailed information, if you happen to be interested, but I am here for a much simpler reason.  I would like to bestow upon you some advice for how to make this Valentine's Day one that will be memorable, and for the right reasons.  

I don't claim to know a lot, but I do know the population of the world is full of three types of people: Those who love Valentine's Day, those who despise it, and those who are indifferent toward it.  No matter what category you fall into, it's still possible for you to make the most of this holiday, sometimes without even spending a dime.

My Bucket List

For quite some time now, I have been storing away little nuggets of information pertaining to my personal Bucket List.  What is a Bucket List, you ask?  Essentially, it is a compilation of things one wishes to accomplish in his or her lifetime before they "kick the bucket."  Here's a little glimpse, albeit a heart wrenching and sad one, into what it's all about:

While the circumstances of the characters in this film make this particular Bucket List experience a tad bit different than my own, I think that the point remains the same: it's never too late to fill your life with meaningful moments and ambitions.

As a social media user in my twenty-somethings, it's all too frequent that I see articles from know-it-all wannabees stating that marriage, and even childbirth, are the end of what used to be an exciting, free-spirited soul who could take on the world and see it all.  Too late for that, married 23 year old mommy-to-be.  You're over the hill and will never be able to feel personal fulfillment on an individual level again.  Shame on you for deciding to devote your life to your husband and children at an age where it is more socially acceptable to get black-out drunk and have a one night stand.  Now that's living.

If you can't tell by my jestful sarcasm, I don't agree with this notion, and I personally feel that fulfillment in life is a personal decision, and comes in a variety of ways.  I don't think- kids or no kids, spouse or no spouse- it is ever too late to follow your dreams and ambitions.  As soon as we start to associate age and family decisions with the inability to be individually happy, we have sentenced ourself to more of a "Countdown to when my Life is no Longer About Me" than a real, meaningful life, and of course no one will feel enriched with an attitude like that.

I digress.  For a little over a decade, now, I have been developing my own Bucket List, and while it's not yet complete, I sort of feel the need to dictate it in a more tangible form, so that I don't start to forget it.  Some of the items on it have already been completed, and some will be completed sooner than others, but for one reason or another I have felt the need to do he following things in my life:

My Bucket List:

• Participate in a flash mob

• I was pretty close to actually doing this, but I don't count it as a "real" flashmob.  I want to participate in a dance flashmob, and I'd love for it to be in a place where no one knows me.
• See Aurora Borealis up close

• This is so stunning and mystifying to me that I feel like I just have to see it up close.  Some day I'd like to travel far enough North at the right time to make this happen.

Super Bowl Commercials through the Years

Hey y'all.

In honor of the athletic holiday known as Super Bowl Sunday, I figured I would share some commercials I've located from throughout the decades/years.

Many say that Super Bowl commercials are some of the most iconic advertisements of the year, and I know of a handful of people who watch the sports-tacular spectacle purely for that reason.  While modern commercials are, by far and away, much more technical, edgy, and oftentimes overtly sexual and racy, Super Bowl commercials leave a legacy of epic proportions.  In no particular order, and for no particular reason, here are ten commercials from Super Bowls past.  Feast, fellow football fanatics.  (Nice alliteration, Corri!  Thanks, Internet!  Glad you noticed,)

#1 - 1969 Gillette Razor, Super Bowl III
This commercial is certainly a throwback to older times, and the voice shifting in tandem with the beard size is auditorially effective, and hella-creepy.

#2 - 1976 Xerox, Super Bowl X

This one makes me laugh because of the monks.  I oft mention the grueling process monks and early musicians had to endure before the printing press existed, and this is just a comical reminder of it.

Take me to Church

If you are familiar with this song, you probably think you know what the topic of my rant is, but I may surprise you yet.

This is a song that was recently released on my local radio station, and I found it was refreshingly unique sounding (compared to the rest of the music on the station) when I heard it, and a lot of my students were singing and talking about it intermittently.  One student mentioned to me that it was not about church at all (which I assumed) but that the video actually depicted a homosexual couple and their struggle at maintaining a relationship without judgment or harassment.  This I found intriguing, so I watched it.

WARNING- While this video is both moving and emotionally charged, it is at times violent and disturbing.  Please refrain from watching if any of the aforementioned characteristics is likely to upset you, and as noted in the video, parental guidance is suggested for anyone viewing under the age of 18.

I'm not going to get into how I feel about the video, or the lyrics, so this is a fake out for those of you that thought this was going to be some sort of social/equality/censorship tirade.  The reason I posted the actual video, and not just a video of the lyrics, is to prove a musical point.  Regardless of how you feel about the lyrics, content of the video, or implied messages within the song, I think that it's painfully obvious that the artist is conveying a message, and that the music is designed to compliment it.  The video is the icing on the cake, directing you to one interpretation of the lyrics, but I'd like to think we can all agree that this is an artistic expression on all fronts.  If that's not the case, now would be a good time to hit the back button on your browser, because my venting is actually purely music related, and if we can't agree to view this song as a work of art, we won't agree on a lot of the rest of this cathartic experience.

Say WHAT?!

This post is dedicated to the skill, or lack thereof, of song lyric recognition.  As a singer, my brain drifts much more so toward the melody or harmony of a song, and sometimes things get lost in translation.  Literally.  Below you will find a list of some of the most memorable lyric misinterpretations I have had, although I know there are many more out there.


Song Title: Get Lucky
Artist: Daft Punk feat. Pharrell
When: 2:30
Sounds like: Who brought the Mexican monkey?

Actual lyric/rationale: We're up all night to get lucky//
So it's pretty clear that this is in fact what they are actually singing, since it's been sung in the song several times at this point, but the auto-tuning really makes it difficult for one to un-hear the Mexican monkey once it's in your brain.

Draw something…ANYTHING…please?

For those that know me very well, especially when I was in my high school days, I am a bit of a conscience-prude.  Meaning, I don't like to cheat.  Like, ever.  I'm also a particularly poor liar, so these two personality traits are likely linked.

Anyway, when I play a game- be it real life or virtual- I am both in it to win it, and an honest player.  Unless it's No Limit Hold 'Em, or other games in which being dishonest is a strategy toward winning.  It is no surprise, though, that I have run across a wide gamut of cheaters in my day.  Whether it be students on homework assignments scrambling to get them done, or online randies that choose to duke it out in Words with Friends, I run across my fair share of people who want things done quickly, and not necessarily with any quality or effort involved.

With homework, I get it.  I don't condone it, obviously, but there's a lot riding on assignments and oftentimes students are overbooked and don't get things done.  Although the mature thing to do is be up front with your teacher, I can completely rationalize the thought process behind why someone would cheat or copy on their homework assignments.  I do NOT, however, understand why a consenting adult selects, downloads, and plays a game application for sheer pleasure/stress release/competitive outlet…and then chooses to play dishonestly.  Straight up makes no sense.  You want to play with others?  For fun?  And then cheat?  Por que?

I got 99 problems, but fluff ain't one

If you do not already know me, I- like most people- am chock full of problems.  Don't lie, you have them too, as does Brangelina and even the saintly T-Swift.  So instead of talking (typing?) your ear off about issues I have, let me tell you a little bit about something that I have in abundance and makes my life better, softer, and an all around safe and wonderful place to exist: fluffy stuff.

This might turn into a mini confession of a moderate hoarder, but hear me out: fuzzy things have never, or maybe rarely, hurt anyone.  Last time I checked, fuzziness was not one of the seven deadly sins (this I know for my other blog doth tell me so) and I'm not blasphemously praying to the holy grail of Pillow Pets, so I'm morally and ethically in the clear, here.  However, I want to invite you to take a glimpse into my world of fluff, for two reasons.  1) To brag about all my fluff-tastic glory, and 2) To hopefully connect with other fuzzy fanatics who may not feel like they have anywhere else to turn.  If you, or someone you love struggles with fuzzy addictions like I, please have them contact me and I can point them in the right direction.

Anyway, without further adieu, here's a glimpse into my eccentric, but very soft and plushy, universe…

I can't have pets in my apartment, but once I move,
you are first on my list, fluffy bunny.  Numero uno.