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| Andrew yells at me for laying on the bed in a wet swimsuit, but the look on my face accurately portrays my absence of care. |
August 21st, Day 4
The fourth day of our trip had a very relaxing start, as we had scheduled a massage in the morning. Being newlyweds, we were each given a complimentary 25 minute body massage at Charlie's spa on the resort. This was particularly exciting for me, as I have never had a professional massage before.
After a hearty breakfast (and a mimosa) we headed up what seemed like 1,000 steps to get to the spa. We had to fill out a questionnaire on arrival, which asked had we eaten food or consumed alcohol in the last hour. When we checked both boxes, Monique (the spa receptionst) sounded surprised that we had already been drinking before 9 am. I guess reading that last sentence back, it does make us sound like raging alcoholics, but my theory is that they wouldn't provide mimosa ingredients at 7:30 am if they didn't want you to get a head start with your drinking.
I can imagine if you've ever had a relaxing massage that there was either very soothing music playing, or that there may have been a sound machine emulating things like a babbling brook, the rainforest, or ocean waves crashing on a rocky shore. I have no experience to compare this to, but I can't think of a better ambiance then actually laying in a shady gazebo on the ocean hearing actual waves crash against the rocky shore. Despite the really greasy feeling afterward, it was just as relaxing as everyone claims it to be, and Andrew and I enjoyed feeling pampered to start our day.
I had to shower to get all the oil off of me, but then we packed our bags for the afternoon cruise we signed up for (recommended to us by Dave Parker, thanks again!) and made our way down to the beach. Today was the first day we experimented with laying in the sun, and it was neither refreshing nor comfortable. I only endured for about 30 minutes, but the silver lining to the raging heat was the immediate cooling sensation from the ocean water. Before you commend me in my bravery of submerging in ocean water, let me just clarify that I merely bounced on my inflatable raft until I got fully wet. Thanks for the vote of confidence, though.
One of the nice things about this resort is that, whilst on the beach, the bartenders provide you with a blue flag. They consistently make rounds to ask if people need drinks, and they also come to you anytime you wave your little blue flag. It's definitely a promotion of laziness, not even having to get up to get your own beverage, but it was very convenient.
We went back to the Pallazzina for lunch, and Andrew was really excited to order the Pad Thai, and I ended up ordering sweet & sour chicken. Maybe I just haven't brushed up enough on my Oriental cuisine, or maybe I don't know what it's really supposed to taste like, but I found it interesting that the best sweet & sour chicken I have eaten came from Jamaica.
Since we planned ahead enough to pack our bags for the catamaran cruise, we headed straight from the beach to the lobby, where we were to depart to the other Couples resort, Tower Island, to set off on our trip to the dock. Once we got to the lobby, we got ready to hop on the bus to the other resort, when the driver asked for our voucher. Yes, we did have it…in the safe in our room, which was like a mile away. We had a driver take a company car through the narrow walkways and roads in the resort to expedite the process, so it was kind of nice that we were the only ones from our resort heading over to the cruise. At least our forgetfulness is only holding us up, and not others. Once we got the voucher, we got on the bus to the other resort, where we were chauffeured by a driver working at the resort. And we are alone as a couple, so you can see where this is headed...
"Hey mon! You just married, ya? I show you de best for less! I give tours of de REAL Jamaica, mon. We see de bobsledding, and Mc Jagger's house. We even see de place Bob Marley lived! Only $70 for tree (three) hours of de real Jamaica, are you interested?"
Of course we're not. We, being you and I, have gone over this before. So naturally, Andrew responds, "Oh man, that does sound interesting! What do you think, honey?" Now, I know Andrew doesn't really want to do this, but he has this disorder where saying no to people physically ails him, so he encouragingly looks at me, where I clearly have to put my foot down and be assertive, so I say, "Oh, uh, well…we have this photo shoot tomorrow at 5:00, so, ummm, well- we will think about it and let you know!" Yep. That's how I assert myself.
So we get off the bus at the resort and we are so excited to see what it looks like. They are owned by the same company, but each Couples resort is a little bit different, and we wanted to see if we'd made the right choice by going with Sans Souci. Life, after all, is just one big competition.
I really liked the decor in their lobby, and the view from the balcony was priceless, however, upon further investigating we think we picked the resort best suited for our interests. While Couples Tower has a gorgeous island across the bay that you can swim or boat up to, it is pretty exposed to the elements in terms of the water, and it was very vulnerable and choppy. The kayakers we observed just paddled in circles, and there was virtually no one in the water. There was also a much larger beach than ours, which can be a + or - depending on how you feel, and thus three rows of beach chairs along the shore, making nice views harder to enjoy. The rooms were pretty much all in a block together, more or less like a hotel, so there may not have been as much variety in the rooms that were included.
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| View of Couples Tower Resort |
One of the nice things about Sans Souci is that it is very secluded, lush, and private, which is what we were looking for. The beach is smaller, but there is no interference with the wind, as we are hidden in a bay. As you can see, the Sans Souci layout is more like little multi room condominiums sprinkled along the resort, hiding between stone pathways, marble stairs, lush green trees and colorful flowers. There are many ocean front rooms, that we didn't really see with the other resort.
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| Overhead view of Couples Sans Souci resort |
Sans Souci also has three pools: one with a swim up bar, one with a waterfall, and one was a mineral pool. Because there were eight different blocks of rooms, each one had very different layouts, patio sizes, and views. It's nice because you can elect for a different room each time you visit, so that you never get the same view twice. We were in the Azalea block (I'M SO FANCY) so we got a nice pool/beach view.
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| Waterfall pool off of the Balloon Bar |
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| The main (aka non-nude) beach |
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| The swim-up bar located in the main pool |
Anyway, I digress! We had to then board ANOTHER bus to get to the catamaran, and as mentioned, we were the only Sans Souci couple there, which was fine. We did see the couple we met on the first day getting off the airplane on the boat. Small world, eh?
We boarded the boat, and had to help load some large crates, which we found out contained liquor. This was more or less a booze cruise, and I was elated to hear it. There were three or four Jamaican gentlemen helping to navigate and sail the catamaran, and one of them was DJing as well. It was like he tapped into my 9th grade dream playlist of objectifying hip hop music, and I loved it- despite the fact there was no Will Smith. Funny thing about Jamaican DJing- they will add raucously loud sound effects and random recorded phrases in the middle of whatever they're playing, whether it makes sense or not. It was a little disconcerting at first, and then it just became ridiculously funny. I suppose DJs in the states do similar things but, you really have to hear it to know what I mean. To each their own!
We got to see some very cool things, including Mystic Mountain, Dolphin Cove, and the limestone quarry that was blown up in one of the James Bond movies!
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| Very poor shot of the limestone quarry |
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| We didn't see the sunset on the sunset cruise, but we saw lots of the sun so that's halfway there |
So after a little tour and some interesting music, we dropped anchor to go swimming. Ummm, what? No one said this was a part of the tour. I could tell you that I was brave and that I dove in, or I could tell you that my deep sea documentaries got the better of me and I pansied out. How about I let you all vote on it and I will tell you what I did afterward. That sounds more mysterious and excitable. Oh, and Andrew did a sideways flip off the boat because he's a showoff. <3
So when I was researching this cruise, I saw pictures of people dancing on the boat, which looked like so much fun! When everyone made their way back on the boat to dry off, the captain asked for four male volunteers and, knowing that Andrew is a fantastic dancer, I volunteered him. I could tell that, deep down, he wanted to do it. Once all four tributes were volunteered by their spouses, I was a little horrified to find out that this was not a fun-loving dance-off, but a drinking competition. Oops.
Here are the rules: the count of one, cups are up; the count of two, cups are at your lips, the count of three, you drink. If you spill, you have a two drink penalty. Enjoy!
So, that was four rum punches in 2:38, and because- and I quote the captain- "I can't believe a white boy can drink rum so fast!", they had a round three, and Mr. Willis won that too. I'm such a proud wifey. :-)
After that, we did some dancing, and sailed back to the docking area. Luckily for us, the bus driver dropped us off at Sans Souci since it was on the way. Buuuut that meant that our "I'll show you de best for less" driver came to pick us up and we weren't there…oops again. At least we managed to weasel our way out of either confessing we lied about being interested about his offer, or politely accepting despite our mutual disdain for the idea. Go, go gadget passive aggressive awkward responses!
We went to the beach for a bit, and hung out at the bar where we met Brian, soon to be our all time favorite bartender. He was doing the COOLEST tricks while making us delicious drinks, and engaging in conversation about how there are no fat Jamaicans and what reggae music he liked. We then had dinner on the beach from the Bella Vista menu, which we'd never done before. We both ordered the beef tenderloin, and also got a calamari appetizer. It came with tartar sauce, which would not do for me, so I asked if they could put some of the mango chutney sauce on it instead, and because everyone there was incredibly awesome, they obliged, and it tasted magnificent.
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| If you look carefully, this is actually an awesome photo of a guy diving into the ocean |
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| Sunset smiles! |
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| Beach chairs and palm trees at sunset |
A kitty came to visit us (there are three stray cats and one kitten on the resort) while we were eating, and while I held my will power, Andrew caved and fed the feline beef tenderloin. Not only would the cat not move and just stared pathetically at Andrew for the duration of dinner, but another diner chidingly called us out on feeding it, since the cat had now parked by our table and this guy had done something similar the other night and got yelled at by his wife. Surprisingly enough, all four cats are very trim, almost skinny. I'm sure they're rarely hurting for a good meal.
We went back to the bar to hang out with Brian. There was a piano sing-a-long at the Balloon Bar happening the next evening, and we asked Brian what songs he'd like to hear most, to which he replied Great Balls of Fire and Big Bamboo. We knew one of these songs, but were keen on researching the other one. As it would turn out, neither of us remembered the name of it when we got back to the room, so we went to bed, planning on asking Brian again tomorrow.
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